Not just Blogger's Block (over the last two years) but also China's recent decision to block access to blogger.com

Sigh. Why are they so afraid of retards with keyboards?

Labels: Bullshit

I'm headed back Stateside very soon, and unfortunately, my residence permit expires while I'm gone. In order to get it extended, I needed to have my Foreign Expert's Certificate extended.

The extension of the foreign expert's certificate requires a week, the extension of the residence permit also requires a week. Each requires multiple trips to multiple offices, lots of paperwork, and a smattering of red rubber stampings.

I leave in a week.

I've managed, somehow, in the last few days, to meet the two friendliest, most helpful Chinese government workers ever. The first in the Office of Importing Foreign Intellectuals (see included photo) the second at the big Public Security Bureau building near the Lama Temple.

The first told me that, if I faxed him a letter explaining my situation and included my flight itinerary, he'd see what he could do. What he did was get my certificate back to me in less than twenty-four hours. He even called me this morning (!!!) to tell me that my certificate would be ready by 3pm. Holy crap.

Oh, and big ups to Melissa and her intern for helping me write the letter.

Today, I tried to get my visa extended. I was told that it would take a week, and a bunch of paperwork (which I didn't have) to get it done.

I explained my situation. She told me that, if I could get the paperwork and red rubber stamps back to her by tomorrow, she'd make sure I had my passport back before I leave. She told me to come straight to her and avoid the other workers.

I'm crossing my fingers... as I need to visit a police station tomorrow for some other paperwork. I hope it goes as smoothly. I also hope I find the incredibly nice lady at the PSB.

I know my friends who helped me get the Foreign Expert's certificate won't ever read this (as it's written poorly in a foreign language... but thanks to them endlessly anyhow.

** Update **
This morning I went to the police station to get my temporary residence whatever thingy we laowai all need but frequently are late in getting...

I ran into someone I casually know, he lived in the same complex and was in need of the same card. He was first in line, and for some reason, they gave him a lot of shit... "You've lived here for this long and still haven't had this done... that's illegal, you know. You should be fined."

For some reason, the same police woman gave me absolutely no trouble and just signed the papers and printed my form.

I headed straight to the PSB, and filled out some forms, talked to the right people, and I'll have my passport back on the morning that I leave. Eek.

Labels: Beijing Adventures, Bullshit, Bureaucracy, Good Luck

Now that I'm 30, there's few changes I have to make to my life, because that's what adults do.

• Stop going to bed at 4am: It's unprofessional. People will think I'm much more professional if I wake up at 6 or 7am and sit in rush hour traffic until 10. This way, when I finally start working at 11 after downing a double tall latte or two, they won't look at me and say, "Just got out of bed?" They'll see an obvious unrested, wired, wage slave and think "Now there's a guy who's got his shit together.
• Think about buying a house: Living with a roommate is something college kids do. What I really need to do if I want people to respect me is tie myself down financially. Having the ability to just go where one pleases is a sign of immaturity, and it's time I move beyond that.
• Get a car: Not in the mid-life crisis way. I'm talking about something practical, dependable and family friendly. Like a Cadillac Escalade.
• Get a haircut and a real job: I'm going bald anyhow, and keeping a 9 to 5 really shows how mature one is. Only a true adult is ready to give up looking for the life he or she wants and accept a life that pays the bills even if it means 8 hours a day with people he or she secretly wants to murder.
• Hang up the chick habit: A girl's not a tonic nor a pill. I need to switch to alcohol: the drug of choice for grown men who otherwise despise their 9-5s, their houses, and their jobs.
  

Labels: Bullshit, Work